I DON'T KNOW

During my very first job in one of the hospitals in Mumbai, I came across this old lady who worked as kitchen staff, but there was something unusual about her. People in the hospital referred to her as weird/crazy and most of them even found her funny.

She wasn't really strange in looks particularly, just like many old females in their 60’s she was a thin and short lady with grey hair, wrinkled skin with a cute face rather. In her regular uniform of shirt and dark skirt, she always tied two plats of her grey hair resembling a school girl. Imagine how cute your granny would look in that attire, that’s exactly how she was. The main reason behind people finding her funny was her habit of repeating a  statement “I don't know” during every conversation. When you talk to her she would either start or end her sentence with the line” I Don't know”, as if it was some kind of constant (used in math formulas) that needs to be there in of each her statement. She would use the term so often that everyone had named her” I don't know” despite having a very sweet name. Let’s assume it as “Bretty”( changed to keep it confidential). 

Personally, somehow I never like it when one person makes fun of the other’s characteristics or situation since my childhood. Till date, I do not enjoy watching videos in which people slipping on the floor or bumping into a wall(except Takeshi’s castle..those guys don't get hurt badly I suppose). Unlike a common reaction, hahaha..mine has always been like oops...Not that I lack a sense of humor but I can't find humor in someone’s pain, its more of an empathetic feeling. I didn't really empathize with Bretty though during that time. I used to wonder what makes her behave in that manner. It didn't even come to me as any mental abnormality. She was just perfect in her job, would take up responsibilities and be famous for her handmade rum cakes.

What makes me remember her even after a decade is her sweet motherly gesture.

 When I used to be so deeply involved in my work, she not only reminded me of meal times but often fed me with her handmade sandwiches saying” You guide others but forget to eat yourself, sister.” The conversation between us, however, wandered around just that one thing. She never ever opened up about herself or her family members, neither was interested in knowing much about mine.

Felt like she had created some kind of a boundary, a defense mechanism in order to avoid any incoming questions, blame, stress....by simply saying “I Don't Know”.  So any issue in the department, she always escaped by saying “I Don't Know” and she was also never er questioned much as everyone was aware of her most expected answer.

However, she wasn’t of the kinds who did some blunder and let the blame on somebody else. Basically, she avoided unnecessary stress that wasn’t meant for her by doing so.

That also makes me think how strong this three-word sentence can be in avoiding so many problems in our day to day life. Someone has rightly said,” Ignorance is bliss”. Well, don't really agree with me on this? Feels like not knowing is lacking knowledge or acting dumb.

Here are a few situations which prove this idiom right:

1)Childhood phase: Ever seen a child constantly stressed? not much can right, unaware of the politics, drama, the child finds happiness in the small stuff.

2)Ignorant of critics: You must have heard the famous story of the deaf frog who made it up to the hill, because he couldn't hear his critics demoralize him” You can't reach there”.If you are ignorant of your critics (giving them a deaf ear) and focus on your goal and have faith, no one on this earth can stop you from achieving it.

3) Ignorance to negativity: How do you feel after reading a newspaper or watching news channels, political fights or some true events based crime serial..anxiety, sadness, anger, pathetic isn’t it? (exceptions:  in case you read only page 3 or see celebrity news). That does not mean you close your eyes to the negative events around you, but it means you need to start focussing on the better aspects of the world ..as focusing on negative events just bring more negativity and hatred while the positive outlook, may help you heal yourself and others.

4)Ignorance of stressful events: Let's say, you come to know you are about to die or your loved one has been detected with a deadly disease and is left with just a few more months to live, you would keep stressing on the future outcome until it occurred, unless you are a very strong person with a very positive attitude.

What I'm trying to convey here is: That it's alright to not know all the answers..knowing too much can lead to overthinking and unnecessary stressing at times.

Well, a lot of people would still continue to disagree on this with me and for valid reasons.

Of course it cant be applied in every situation. In the bargain of avoiding stress, you might just invite more by implementing it. Imagine your boss comes and asks you what happened about the “x “project, you’ve already crossed the deadline?" And you get so inspired by this article answering him” IDK”.You might just put your job on stake.

On a serious note, ignorance can be blissful if applied at the right place and at the right time.

My spouse says that he learns something new from each person he comes across. I would say I take this learning from Bretty of avoiding unnecessary stressors that do not need my attention.

So stay blissful and ignorant to needless stress.